The Humility of "How Can I...?" Love Changes the Question

Why can't you?

Don't you see?

Why must you always?

Maybe if you...

Same conversation, but ask a different question

to set the direction, pace, and cadence...

Can I offer first my:

vulnerability, failings, role in what transpired

before I eloquently explore

the blame I heap onto you?

Can I lift the lid off the boiling pot

and release the steam so that

the waters, like rapids in my heart,

can slow and find their

way through those rocky passages?

Can I make the first move so as to

lessen the intensity but still

dial up the truth?

Can I serve us both by offering first

to serve you,

by laying down my anger and resentments...

and ask of myself

by asking you..

"How can I..."

What can I..."

Maybe if I..."

So that "we....can still be we" after

Lift the Lid

August 13, 2025

From "Musings"

Thank you for reading and considering these musings...

  To consider: In what way can you improve communication when there is a disagreement with someone you care about?

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